


His Demons That He Hides... she's all he knows

by woa



Category: All Time Low, His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman
Genre: Abuse, Alternate Universe - Daemons, Bullying, Daemons, Depression, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, F/M, His Dark Materials Inspired, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, Jack's mom died a while back, Jack's not use to people being nice to him, M/M, Neglect, Past Child Abuse, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Slurs
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-21
Updated: 2017-08-04
Packaged: 2018-05-22 08:22:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 11,811
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6072028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/woa/pseuds/woa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Basically, Jack is special and has a daemon. He also has a sad life, and is very depressed and angsty and shit. Eventual Jalex. Eventual recovery. I don't know what's wrong with me that I keep writing stories with depressed characters, self-harm, eating disorders, etc.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Alex was getting his first period chemistry book out of his locker, half-listening to his friends’- Rian and Zach- conversation. Zach had Mr. Ilse’s creative writing for first period and Rian had AP Calculus. Mrs. Tenner’s room was around the corner from their lockers, so Alex had plenty of time even though the first bell had just rung.Mr. Ilse was in the next block over on the 2nd floor, but Mr. Ilse was always 10 minutes late to first period, so Zack was good as well. And Rian’s class was literally right across the hall from their lockers, so the three of them often spent the last minutes before class in no hurry. Zach stopped talking about the myth of the minotaur, a subject that Alex didn't particularly care about, and said “New kid, 12 o’clock” and pointed down the hall. Alex stood up, pushing his locker door shut and looked over while zipping his bag. What he saw- or rather who, was a tall, lanky guy with dark brown hair with a blond streak in it. Alex guessed that the kid had to be at least 6’, but was slouched over so much that he seemed to take up less space than Amanda Smith, their class’ petite vice president and unofficial welcome/tour guide for new students. Amanda was talking animatedly, smiling her megawatt smile, but the boy looked so uncomfortable.

“I overheard Coach talking to Mr. Adams yesterday about a new student who was going to try out for the team, this must be him.” Rian nodded over to the new kid and Amanda. Alex shrugged, and waved good bye to his two friends and began to walk to first period. As he rounded the corner he heard someone coming up behind him and turned back when Amanda called out his name. Amanda was jogging over, with the new kid trailing behind her towards him. “Alex, you’re first period is with Tenner, right?” The new boy stayed 3 steps behind Amanda, not moving any closer, Alex thought he saw something move in the boy’s messenger bag. “Uh, yeah?” Amanda smiled widely and sighed in relief. “Awesome, and for 2nd you have…” she trailed off expectantly, but Alex was distracted, because he was sure he did see something in the boy’s bag. “Oh, uh, Ms. Staff, why?” Amanda quickly answered, as the 2nd bell rang overhead, 1 minute till class. “Good, Jack here” she waved back behind her at the new kid -Jack- who gave a small smile in Alex’s direction, though it looked more like a grimace than a smile. “Jack’s in both of those classes- I have 3rd, 4th, and 6th with him, so I was wondering if you’d help me out by helping out Jack today.” It didn’t sound like a question, and Alex had a feeling that there was no way out of this, no matter what he said. So, a bit reluctantly, Alex nodded and said, “Sure”. Amanda flashed him another bright smile and thanked him, before turning to Jack and explaining that she would meet him after 2nd period at Ms. Staff’s room so they could go to 3rd together, and Jack wouldn’t get lost. After thanking Alex again Amanda took off, speed walking down the hall and Alex gestured for Jack to follow him down to their classroom.

Mrs. Tenner was at her desk, which was situated right by the door and Alex greeted her “Morning Mrs. Tenner, uh we have a new student.” Mrs. Tenner looked up at Alex then behind him to Jack who was still in the doorway, staring at their classmates in what Alex thought was fear. “This is Jack.” Mrs. Tenner motioned for Jack to come over and he slowly stepped over, staying a foot away from Alex. “Welcome, sir. Now you’re Mr. Barakat, correct?” Jack nodded, then mumbled “Yes, ma’am” when Mrs. Tenner didn’t look up from a folder in front of her. “You moved from Ohio?” She read from what Alex gathered was Jack’s new student information. Jack shuffled nervously from foot to foot “Yes, ma’am”. Alex was still standing there and began to think that he should have sat down after introducing Jack, but Mrs. Tenner addressed him. “And Alexander, are you the one showing him around?” Alex glanced at Jack, who was staring at his feet. “Just for first and second period. Amanda’s the one with the welcome wagon.” Mrs. Tenner chuckled, Amanda Smith’s enthusiasm was well known. “Well, Jack you can take the seat next to Alexander.” Alex moved, feeling dismissed, but Mrs. Tenner spoke again “Jack?” Her voice took a different tone, one Alex couldn’t name, but he saw Jack stiffen when he looked back. She glanced up at Jack from his file. “It says here that you’re a Mirus?” Alex’s eyes widened, Mirus’ were extremely rare, one in ten million rare. “Is that correct?” Alex starred at Jack in awe as he nodded and whispered “Yes, ma’am”. Mrs. Tenner looked down, but quickly looked up again. “Your daemon’s species isn’t listed, however.” She leaned over her desk a bit to look closer at Jack’s figure. “Where is it- your daemon?” Alex might have imagined the slight flinch from Jack when Mrs. Tenner said it. Something in Jack’s bag moved and popped out, pushing up the closer flap. It was a cat. A tannish, striped, small cat. It meowed and scrunched its nose at Mrs. Tenner. “House cat?” Mrs. Tenner poised her pen to fill in the missing information, but waited for Jack to reply. Alex watched as he and his daemon had a silent conversation of sorts that ended with Jack nodding stiffly before looking back at Mrs. Tenner and replying “An Egyptian Mau, ma’am.” Alex watched as the cat- the daemon went back down, hiding again. “And does it have a name?” This time Alex was sure that Jack did flinch. He didn’t know much about Mirus’ and their daemons, but from an elective last semester at the local community college Alex knew that daemons were the Mirus’ physical manifestation of their being, some called them their soul. So Alex was shocked and a bit embarrassed, just from association, by Mrs. Tenner. Calling someone an it, because really Jack’s daemon was essentially him, was insulting, and of course Jack’s daemon would have a name. Jack eventually answered, seeming to collect himself. “ _Her_ name is Eona.” Jack’s voice was biting, Alex had learned that it was disrespectful for anyone other than the Mirus’ family and closest friends to address their daemon directly. Hopefully that wouldn’t happen, Alex thought that maybe the teachers should have been given some list of do’s and don’ts. Thankfully one of their classmates’ loud exclamation of the words “fucking goddamn cheating whore!” reminded Mrs. Tenner that she actually had a class to teach.

Alex was able to slink away to his seat in the back corner when Mrs. Tenner made her way to the front of the room, calling everyone’s attention. Alex looked back and saw that Jack was still standing by the desk. “Jack?” Alex called quietly and waved him over. Jack sat down and carefully placed his bag on the ground. “Is she comfortable in there?” Alex couldn’t help but asking. Jack looked at him in confusion “What?” Mrs. Tenner started her lesson, finally and Alex nodded down at the messenger bag between their desks. “Eona? Is she comfortable in your bag?” Alex thought, a bit late, that maybe it was rude of him to ask about Jack’s daemon. “We don’t want to draw attention.” Alex thought back to the college class, and nodded. Because Mirus’ were extremely rare many people found them off-putting and creepy. His professor had spent an entire week discussing how Mirus’ could be compared to homosexuals in the way that society viewed both as unnatural, and many were labeled as freaks and were called degrading slurs, and some were even the victims of bigoted acts of violence. Alex thought about how “accepting” their school was- it wasn’t, though it was better now that Zack was captain of the soccer team- the school’s main sport- and came out as bisexual at the beginning of the year, when he had brought his now ex-boyfriend to homecoming. Alex sighed and gave Jack a sad smile. “Got it.”

The class went on without incident until the end. With 2 minutes left Mrs. Tenner brought the rest of the class’ attention to Jack, who had been pretty invisible at the very back with just Alex and Ricky, a kid who slept through 80% of their classes (but was still pulling an A-). Alex thought that Jack looked like he was going to either puke or faint, so he was glad that Mrs. Tenner didn’t ask the boy to introduce himself and didn’t mention Eona, who was wiggling around in the messenger bag, anxious just like her counterpart. Jack and he were the last two out, aside from Ricky who was being scolded (again) by Mrs. Tenner. “So, that was first period chem with Mrs. Tenner…” Jack shrugged, looking awkward as he tried to stay close to Alex in the crowded hall, while still making room so Eona in his bag wouldn’t be pushed or shoved. “What’s your locker number?” Alex asked, not sure if Jack wanted to deposit his brand new chemistry book he had gotten and was holding in his hand instead of in his bag. “Uh” Jack started to reach in his bag, but was pushed roughly into Alex by someone. “Freak!” Alex recognized the voice, Matt York, douchebag extraordinaire. “You okay?” Alex had felt Jack’s bag hit him, and was worried both for Jack and his daemon, “Are you two okay?” Alex turned and pulled Jack into an alcove. Jack was looking at him like he had grown a second head “Yeah, yeah we’re good.” Alex raised an eyebrow but didn’t comment. “So that was Matt York, he’s a dick, but mostly harmless.” Jack nodded looking around before opening his bag and reaching inside. Alex watched as he petted Eona, both relaxing at the contact, before he reached for a notebook. He opened it then said “503”. It took Alex a second to remember that he had asked a question “Really?” Jack nodded, putting the notebook back. “That’s 5 down from mine, right next to Zack’s.” Alex gestured for them to continue walking as the warning bell rang. “Zack?” Jack folded over the closing flap and followed Alex down the hall. “Yeah, he’s one of my best friends.” Alex remembered what Rian said he overheard and added “He’s captain of the soccer team.” Jack looked uncomfortable when he said that. “You’re trying out, right? Rian, my other best friend, said he overheard Coach talking about it.” The two of them entered Ms. Staff’s room and Alex walked with Jack over to the teacher’s desk. “Are you on the team?” Alex nodded, but didn’t reply.

“Hello!” Ms. Staff was in her early 20’s, she was blonde haired, blue eyed, and peppy. She often wore bright colors and was wearing a yellow sundress with dark tights and a jacket. “You must be Jack Barakat. Hi, I’m Ms. Staff, welcome to Art History.” Most people found Ms. Staff’s attitude infectious, but Jack was still slouched over and only smiled shortly. Undeterred Ms. Staff went on “Now, according to your file you’re an Mirus?” Jack looked wary but nodded and answered “Yes, ma’am”. “Okay, is there anything I need to know, or anything I can do to make class more comfortable for the two of you?” Alex smiled, Ms. Staff was incredibly open minded and kind, she probably knew more about daemons than the older teachers, like Mrs. Tenner. “Um, can… would it be possible for me to get a seat near a wall? Somewhere where Eona can stay without anyone touc- disturbing her?” Jack scratched his forearms through his long sleeved shirt. Ms. Staff smiled, “Of course, actually you can sit in the back on the right, if it’s okay with Alex to switch seats?” Jack looked over at him and Alex smiled and nodded, “Sure, no problem. So I get the wobbly desk?” The one empty desk in the back was missing one of the metal bits at the end of the leg so it was off balance. “I can—“ Jack started to protest, but Ms. Staff laughed and Alex grinned. “Don’t worry about it Jack, it’s just a joke- kind of.” Ms. Staff smiled again then shuffled through some papers, dismissing the boys. Alex once again led Jack, and they sat down in the back. The girl in front of Jack’s seat- previously Alex’s- turned around when they sat down. “Who are you?” It wasn’t rude, just forward and Jack stuttered out his name. “He’s new.” Alex added, though it was obvious. “Hmm…” The girl looked him up and down. “I’m Izzy” and she turned around. Ms. Staff came to the back and handed Jack a book before moving to shut the door, locking it- she didn’t allow late students after she locked the door. They were starting a movie today, so the lights were turned off too. Alex looked over and saw Jack open his bag and watched as Eona stepped out. She jumped up onto Jack’s lap and Alex stared for a bit. Eona was actually really cute, but in the ‘don't fuck with me’ sort of way. She was definitely comparative to a house cat, but she carried herself differently. Alex turned away when she turned towards him.  

All too soon the lights came back on, temporarily blinding Alex. He turned his head and watched as Eona got up, stretching- she had fallen asleep, Alex realized and he wondered if that meant that Jack had dozed off too. Eona jumped down to the ground and stepped back into their bag. There was 4 minutes left before the bell, but Ms. Staff was done so the students were talking amongst themselves. Izzy got up and went to her friend’s desk and so did the kid in front of Alex. “What do you have next?” Alex asked, a bit sad that he didn’t have another class with Jack. Even though Jack was introverted and hadn’t really said much, Alex liked him, he seemed to have a good taste in music, judging by his blink-182 shirt and how he had hummed some Green Day and Fall Out Boy songs earlier. “Gym.” Jack looked pained, Alex could relate. “Ah, that’s my 4th, dude.” Jack nodded and looked worriedly at the open messenger bag. “How…” Alex trailed off, unsure if it would be rude to ask. “How are we going to do gym class?” Jack guessed. “Yeah.” Alex propped his head on his hand, elbow on the desk, turned towards Jack. “E and I don’t have to be right next to each other.” Jack paused. “We should be fine as long as we don’t go outside… unless I can bring her out with me.” Alex thought about what they had been doing in gym. “Nah, you’re going to be inside today, we’re playing tennis.” Jack sighed. “So, you never answered before, are you trying out for the team?” Jack shrugged, looking straight at Alex, mimicking his posture. “My dad suggested it.” The way Jack said suggested told Alex that it was more than a suggestion. “Do you want to try out?” Jack shrugged again and opened his mouth to say something, but closed it again. “Do you know how to play soccer?” Alex felt like he should ask; it was obvious that Jack did not want to try out. “Yeah, we were on the team in middle school for a bit.” Alex blinked momentarily at the plural we- but it made sense, they were together, a packaged deal, Jack and Eona, Eona and Jack. “Did you guys like it?” It seemed to throw Jack off as well, Alex’s inclusion of Eona. “We liked it well enough… but we liked playing by ourselves more.” Jack looked distant. “You don’t have to try out…” Alex offered, wanting to know just how much of a suggestion his dad was implying. “My dad thinks it’d be a good idea, he used to play himself.” Oh, Alex thought, Jack’s dad was one of those fathers. “My dad used to push me into those academic things, you know for gifted kids” Alex made finger quotations “Wanted me to go into biochemistry like him…” Alex sighed and chuckled softly. Jack was looking at him, focused entirely. “And?” Alex grinned, sardonically, “And he finally took a hint when I failed basic environmental science in 8th grade, I have to work with a tutor for chem” the second part Alex stage-whispered. Jack laughed, and it surprised Alex enough that he started laughing as well. He has a great laugh, Alex thought. Alex collected himself just before Jack and Alex saw that Eona was watching him with a calculating look in her eyes. “So, what you’re saying is that I should totally bomb our try out?” Jack’s face was lit up with an actual smile and Alex found himself wanting to keep it there. “Sure, man. If you want, I can let Zack know that you don’t really want to be on the team, too. As captain he gets to decide along with Coach.” Jack beamed at him. “That’d be awesome!” The bell rung startling the two of them and Alex laughed silently when he saw Eona jump slightly, too. “Well…” Alex grabbed his bag and stood up, Jack did the same. “What’s the rest of your schedule, we already know we have different classes 3rd and 4th, but what about lunch? What block are you? And what do you have after lunch?” Alex and Jack made it out the door and Alex glanced around for Amanda. If she wasn’t there Alex would happily walk Jack to the gym. Alex thought about what that meant, but was distracted by Jack’s reply. “Uh, “A” block lunch and study hall with, um… Mr. Ricord, then calculus with Mrs. Richardson, uh, music theory, and French II with Mrs. Adams.” Jack put the notebook back and looked back at Alex, following him without much thought. Alex was already walking to the gym, he had to pass it on his way to 3rd period anyway.

 “Cool, we have lunch together, you can sit with Zack, Rian, and I, if you want.” Jack nodded, shuffling, carefully switching the bag to his left side. “And we have Ricord, too, he’s really laid back, which is nice. Uh, I don’t have calc, but I do have music and French, so…” Jack smiled. Alex was stopped when someone grabbed his arm from behind. “Hey ‘Lex, what’s up?” Rian fell in step with him and Jack, looking around Alex at Jack for a moment before focusing ahead. “Showing Jack to the gym. Oh!” Alex clasped Rian’s shoulder. “Jack, Eona, this is my friend Rian.” Alex included the daemon because her head was poking out and she was looking at his friend, but maybe he shouldn’t have. But Rian didn’t make a scene, he glanced down at their bag then back up at Jack, smiled and said “Welcome, dude. You any good at tennis?” Alex forgot that Rian had gym 3rd. “I’m decent.” Jack shrugged, back to shyly folding into himself. Rian just nodded, and continued to smile. “Well, I suck ass, so you do not want me as a partner.” Alex laughed with his friend. “Yeah, he’s terrible. Rian’s hand-eye coordination sucks, but his foot-eye coordination rocks.” Alex joked. “Oh, you’re on the team.” Jack seemed to remember Alex telling him about Rian overhearing Coach’s conversation. “Yep, I’m not as good as Zack, but I can beat Alex, easily.” Alex huffed. “Lies, Jack, it’s all lies.” Jack smiled at him, a smaller version, but still bright. It gave Alex butterflies, which made Alex pause. But he regained his stride a second later and the three boys stopped in front of one of the gym’s entrances. “Well, okay, uh I’ll see the three of you at lunch. Rian, take care of him, and Jack don’t listen to a word he says about me, he’s just jealous.” Rian rolled his eyes. “Oh, and find out what happened to Jack’s welcoming committee, it’s not like Amanda to drop the ball like this.” Rian mockingly saluted Alex and Jack smiled and waved. 

Alex’s next two periods seemed to drag on forever. Rumors had started to spread about Jack, and someone had found out that he had a daemon. Alex was worried about how the school would react. He could already guess how some students and teachers would react; Matt York and his squad would react as well as they had to Zack’s boyfriend. Rian’s girlfriend Cassadee and most of her fellow cheerleaders would be welcoming, as would most of the kids in their music theory class, especially since Jack knew good music. Alex didn’t know all of Jack’s teachers, so he wasn’t sure about them, hopefully he didn’t have Mr. Arlee, an old racist and homophobic white man who didn’t like anything ‘abnormal’, but the teachers Jack had listed should be fine, hopefully. Not all of them would be like Ms. Staff, most would be like Mrs. Tenner, more likely.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Amanda is not as sweet as she looks, and Alex is definitely flirting now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning: use of the 'f' word.

Alex was waiting just outside the cafeteria doors, for his best friends, and also for Jack and Eona. Coach had let the class out early after Noah Peters accidently hit Rachel Merida directly in the face with a tennis ball and she had to be taken to the nurse’s office. Alex was quietly humming a tune, and staying out of the crowd’s way when he spotted Zack and waved him over. “Hey, man, what’s up?” Alex smiled and shrugged. “Not much, hey, uh that new kid- Jack- he’s going to be sitting with us.” Alex glanced at his friend beside him. Zack smiled “Cool, well I’m gonna get us a table then.” He gave Alex a pat on the shoulder and headed inside. There were enough seats for every student in their lunch block, but if you wanted to claim a table for just you and your friends you had to do it quickly. Alex saw Rian shortly after Zack left, he didn’t stop by Alex, who just nodded at him- signaling that they had a table- and went in.

Alex was tapping his foot anxiously, it was 6 minutes into 5th period, “A” block and Jack wasn’t there. Just as Alex began doubting himself, Amanda Smith turned the corner. “Amanda!” Alex shouted, grabbing her attention. She smiled and walked over to him. “Hey… where’s Jack?” He asked. The smile fell off of Amanda’s face “I don’t know and I don’t care.” Alex stepped back in shock, he’d never seen or heard Amanda be anything other than positive, but there had been venom in her voice. “What do you mean you don’t know? It’s your job to show him around!” Alex shot back. “As if I would ever socialize with that freak!” She huffed and went to step around him, but Alex stepped with her, blocking her way. “Don’t ever call Jack a freak, got it.” He starred down at her, he had a good foot and a half on her, and had been told many times that his eyebrows were sort of intimidating. “He’s a Mirus” Amanda hissed the last word. “So?!” Alex glared at her. “So, he’s a fr-“. “Don’t call him a freak, Amanda.” Alex’s voice was sharp. Amanda stepped back, staring back at him with disgust and some fear. “Whatever, I’m going to lunch, your boyfriend ran to the bathroom by the art room, fag.” This time Alex let her pass, and he took off running to the next block over.

The halls were, fortunately, empty besides Alex. He really didn’t need a detention from a teacher or hall monitor. He slowed down when he got to the art room and walked to the restroom. The last stall- the handicapped one- was shut and Alex bent over to see under. He saw, what he recognized as Jack’s shoes and jeans, meaning that Jack was sitting on the floor inside. He was crying. “Jack?” Alex called quietly. Jack stopped crying, hiccupping as he tried to stop his tears. “Jack?” A few more sniffles, “Alex?” Jack’s voice was utterly shot. “Can I come in?” Alex stood outside the stall. Alex heard the door unlock and he pushed it open. Jack was still on the floor in the corner, Eona had opened the door for him. “Hey, guys.” Alex set his bag down, relocked the door, and sat down next to- but not too close to Jack. “Hey, Alex, um… sorry about um, not coming to lunch.” Alex shrugged and offered Jack a small smile, “That’s okay, I packed today anyway.” Alex grabbed his bag and pulled out a smushed pb&j in a Ziploc bag and a snickers bar. “We didn’t” Alex nodded again. “I thought so, here” he offered Jack the snickers. “Oh, no it’s—“ Alex handed it to him. “Seriously, here. I’ll text Zack or Rian and tell them to grab some food for us and bring it to study hall, okay?” Jack took the candy and nodded.

“So…” Alex didn’t know what to say. “Come here often?” Jack laughed. Alex chuckled a second after, was he flirting with Jack? “No, E and I don’t usually sit in empty bathrooms.” Eona at the mention of her walked over and promptly sat on Jack’s lap, and he immediately started petting her. “Oh good, neither do I.” They went back to silence. Alex unzipped his sandwich and took a bite, he saw Jack do the same with the snickers bar. “So…” Alex said again, cursing his awkwardness. “Amanda Smith is a bitch.” He said and took a bite so he wouldn’t say anything else. Jack tensed slightly, but relaxed again. “Yeah, she is…” Alex swallowed and pondered on what to say next. “How did- I mean, why? Why do you think she’s a bitch?” Alex set down his sandwich, “I was waiting for you and Eona outside the café and saw Amanda- without you two, so I asked her where you were.” Jack was looking at him with that look again, like he didn’t understand Alex. Well, Alex didn’t understand Jack and Eona either. “And what’d she say?” Alex sighed and turned to face Jack. “She called you a freak.” Jack flinched back “Oh.” Alex clasped a hand on Jack’s shoulder. “Yeah, I may or may not have threatened her, kinda.” Jack gaped at him. “What?” Alex shrugged, retracted his hand, and took out his phone. “I mean, there wasn’t like an actual threat, I just told her to not call you a freak. She got real pissy at that, called me a fag.” Alex chuckled, that word didn’t affect him. Sure he hated when people used it- it was a derogatory slur, but it didn’t bother him when people called him a fag or faggot. “What!? I mean… um are- I mean thanks, dude, bro, um, Alex. Thanks.” Alex looked at Jack’s flushed face in bemusement, and decided not to mention the part where Amanda called Jack his boyfriend. “Your welcome, Jack, dude, bro, man.” He smiled warmly at Jack and Eona, so they knew he wasn’t really making fun of them. “Were you going to ask me if I'm gay?” Alex asked after Jack smiled back. At the question Jack’s face flushed even redder and Eona hid her face in Jack’s shirt. “Uh… no?” Alex raised an eyebrow at him. “Yes.” Jack confessed. Alex grinned and laughed. “No.” Alex answered honestly, but hastily added, “I’m pansexual.” When Jack’s face fell. “Oh.” Jack blinked, eyes wide. “Yeah…” it was silently awkward again. “That’s uh cool.” Alex looked down away from Jack, hand rubbing his neck. “We’re bi.” Alex’s head shot up and he looked at Jack. “Yeah?” Jack nodded. Alex smiled and said “Cool… Cool. Cool. Cool.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so no jalex yet, but like they like eachother, but I'll wait a few weeks for Jack and Eona to get settled.


	3. Chapter 3

"Boy! Get down here!" Eona tensed as Bassam Barakat yelled upstairs to his only son. Jack stood up slowly and set his daemon on their bed. "Stay up here." Jack instructed and went downstairs, feeling the slight pull in his chest at the distance between his daemon and himself. Bassam was in the living room with a football match on the TV. Jack's father had a beer in his hand and Jack took note of the 3 other empty cans on the coffee table. Bassam muted the match and turned slightly towards his son, who was cowering in the corner. Bassam turned back around and took a drink. "You have the tryout tomorrow after school" Jack nodded, though his father wasn't looking. "Yessir." Bassam grunted. "You're going to make wing-back." The slurred speech wasn't a question, more of a demand. "I'm trying out for that position, yessir. The team already has 2 wing-backs for each team, varsity and jv." Alex was one of the varsity team's wing-backs. Bassam took another drink. "I was a wing-back in my day boy, the best in the district." Jack had heard this all before. "Yessir." Bassam glanced back at his son. "What about that demon of yours?" Jack didn't visibly flinch at the slur from his father. Eona was his daemon, not a demon. "Where's it going to be when you're on the field?" Jack swallowed audibly. "In our bag on the bench?" Jack hadn't meant to end it as a question. "It belongs locked in the locker room." This time Jack flinched, since his father's focus was again on the TV. "Yessir." Bassam huffed. "Now get out of here!" he turned the volume back on and Jack hastily retreated back upstairs. 

* * *

 

 

 

By the time Thursday came Jack was fully integrated into their small group. So when Mr. Atton told their music class that he was assigning them a new group project Jack, for once in his life, didn’t have to awkwardly wait for everyone else to partner up and then just join the unfortunate soul(s) that were left. No, this time as soon as Mr. Atton said “I’ll let you chose your partners.” Alex actually shouted “I call Jack and Eona!” springing up with his hand raised. “Well, that’s all fine and dandy Mr. Gaskarth, but this is a four-person project.” Mr. Atton told him and the rest of the class tittered. “Oh, well then I call dibs on Zack and Rian, too.” Rian snorted and the rest of the class chuckled. “Nice to know we’re loved, dude.”

The assignment was to write a song. An entire, complete song- with lyrics and music. And they would have to preform it, this caused some stress in the class as not everyone played an instrument or sung, but Mr. Atton wasn’t swayed and just suggested that they write in some triangle parts or something. Zack was the one to ask. “Do you guys play anything?” Jack nodded and reached down to pet Eona who was weaving around his feet. “I play the guitar” Alex grinned. “Me too!” Zack leaned over and muttered something to Rian that sounded suspiciously like ‘gay’. Rian shook his head, fondly. “So, what’s the plan?” They had 10 minutes left in the period. “We can use some of Alex’s lyrics? Right dude?” Zack proposed. Alex flushed. “Uh, yeah, I guess. Uh… what kind of song are we thinking of?” Jack picked up Eona and she settled in his lap. “What’s genre are your lyrics?” He asked, a bit timidly. Alex paused to think about it. “Sad? Some of them are just like whatever. Punk? Why don’t we do a punk song?” Rian shook his head. “Pop punk, I think would be more our style.” The period ended with the four of them having tentative plans to meet that Saturday to start the music.

  

Alex and Jack walked to French class, Eona safe inside Jack’s bag. “Hey, what are you two doing this weekend, aside from Saturday?” Alex asked as they made their way to their seats. Jack shrugged, pulling off his bag and setting it on the desk. “There’s the soccer tryouts on Sunday that my dad’s still insistent about. He says he wants me to try out so that we’ll actually make friends.” Truthfully, Jack thought, his dad wanted him to be on the team so he wouldn't be such a disappointment, and that he would spend time with humans instead of with his daemon. Alex scowled, “But you already have made friends, 3 of them. Me, Zack, and Rian.” Eona head-butted Jack’s arm, and Jack shrugged. "I'll still have to try out, why?" Alex pulled out his French text before answering. "Well I was wondering if you two wanted to maybe come over Friday and hang out, then stay overnight since we're planning on working on the project in my basement, for now. Eona looked up at her human counterpart with wide eyes, mentally begging. She (and Jack) had no idea why they felt so comfortable around Alex, but they did and Eona wanted to know more about him. "Uh, is it okay with your parents?" Jack thought back to the one time he brought a friend home. It was in 2nd grade and Nick had been new, Nick didn't treat him or Eona like they had some sort of disease, mainly because Nick's own mother was a Mirus. Young Jack had asked his mother who timidly told him to ask his father. His father had laughed at him, laughed at the idea that he even had a friend. "Of course, dude. Ever since I told my mom you two moved here she's been telling me to invite you over for dinner." Jack smiled, the memory of him and Eona crying in their room after telling Nick no forgotten.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry it's so short, major writer's block and procrastination... also all the wing-back shit is just what i looked up online


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for how long this took!

As soon as French class ended on Friday Alex and Jack walked straight to their lockers. “So you’re still coming over later, right?” Alex asked shoving unneeded text books back into his locker and grabbing those he would need for homework over the weekend. Jack nodded. Eona stepped out of their bag and jumped to sit on the top shelf in their locker so Jack could also pack his books. Alex finished and closed his locker shut first and moved down to Jack and Eona. “So, I have practice until 6, I can pick the two of you up right after that, if that’s cool with you?” Jack thought about it, waiting for Eona to step into the bag again to shut his locker. Bassam had said that he wouldn’t be home until late tonight. Jack wasn’t entirely sure what time that meant, but Jack hadn’t said anything about going to Alex’s to his father yet. Jack nodded again and said. “Yeah, that’ll be fine.” Deciding that his father wouldn’t miss him, probably wouldn’t even notice that he wasn’t in his room, unless he wanted to ‘practice’ before Jack’s tryout tomorrow. Jack hoped that Bassam wouldn’t be home until after Alex picked him and Eona up, he really didn’t want Alex to meet his dad.

Jack and Eona quickly said good bye to Alex, Zack, and Rian and began their walk home. After about a mile, when the number of houses dwindled and there was no one walking in the vicinity back from school Eona jumped out of the bag. “This’ll be good.” She murmured quiet enough that Jack shouldn’t have been able to hear her, but he could because of their bond. “It’ll be fun.” He agreed, picking at his shirt sleeves anxiously. “Alex isn’t going to hurt us.” Eona said, and it sounded more like a question. Jack shook his head roughly and stumbled as his head swarmed with dizziness. “No, he’s our friend.” Eona paused and looked up at her human. They had never had a friend before, she didn’t have to say out loud. Jack shrugged his backpack higher and walked a bit faster.

A good time later Jack rounded the corner and saw his father’s car in the driveway. His stomach dropped. He wasn’t meant to be home. He and Eona stopped so that she could hide back in the bag. Jack thought about just climbing the tree in the backyard and going in through his window so he wouldn’t have to pass by his father, but remembered that he couldn’t climb that well and if his father found him in his room like that he’d be mad. Slowly Jack made his way to the front door and paused outside of it to listen in for any danger. The only thing he could hear was that of the TV so he gently opened the door. Jack managed to get inside, close the door behind him, and make it halfway up the stairs before a loud shout made him stop. Distressed, Jack set down the bag and Eona who was still hiding inside of it and turned back around. “Boy! Get in here now!” His father’s voice was coming from the kitchen, so that’s where Jack went, leaving Eona on the stairs. Jack’s arms wrapped around him, tightly holding himself together. He kept his eyes downcast as he entered the room and said. “Yessir?” Jack was shaking a little as he looked up at his dad.

Bassam was sitting at the kitchen table, going through some blank forms than were probably from work. “Mr. Yoeshep invited me out to a conference this weekend. I’ll be leaving at 5 tonight, I’ll be back just in time to watch your tryouts on Sunday.” Jack didn’t say anything. “So you’ll be home alone” Now Bassam turned to his son. “I want this house to be clean when I get home, and none of my beers better be missing. Understand me, boy?” Jack nodded quickly. Bassam looked at him, eyes boring into him and seeming to be judging every imperfection. This was about the time that a parent would tell their child that they weren’t allowed to have friends over, or to have a party, but both Jack and Bassam knew that neither would happen. Finally, Bassam nodded and turned back to his work, dismissing Jack entirely. Without running Jack made it quickly back to Eona and picked her and the bag up and went into their bedroom and shut the door behind them.

Jack sat on his bed for a while, doing nothing. He was thinking of all the ways that this weekend could go wrong. What if Alex wasn’t really his friend? What if he was hanging out with them as a prank or a joke? What if Jack ruined things by being too weird at Alex’s house? What if he played horribly on Saturday? What if Alex and Rian and Zack thought he sucked at guitar? What if they didn’t want to be in a group with him? And Sunday… Sunday. How would his father react to his tryout? Jack’s stomach turned nauseously at his thoughts and his lungs felt constricted. Jack quickly stood and launched himself into his adjoined bathroom, just in time for him to throw up what he had eaten at lunch earlier that day. Finding himself in a bathroom, hunched over a toilet with stomach acid burning his throat wasn’t a new thing for Jack. He was diagnosed with anxiety, ADHD, and major depression years ago, when his mom was still alive. Jack sat down on the tile floor and slumped against the wall. Eona was sitting up on the sink looking worried. A lot of the times Jack wondered why… why did he get a daemon? Was it so he wouldn’t have to be entirely alone? So that he would have someone with him who could never leave, and who would love him no matter what? Jack didn’t hate Eona, he depended on her, she was the best part of him- he just hated himself. When the nausea passed Jack pulled himself up off the floor and flushed the toilet. He moved to the sink and gargled with some mouthwash. He stared too long at his reflection and jumped when Eona’s head rubbed against his forearm. He looked down, his opposite hand reflexively moving to pet her soft fur. Eona rubbed again at his arm and this time Jack looked down and swore under his breath. His left sleeve of his shirt was bunched up to his elbow and Jack saw that along with scratching ugly red marks on his too pale skin, he had also reopened a few of the cuts that littered his exposed skin. “Shit.” Jack quickly reached into one of his drawers and got a cotton pad and some alcohol to clean his cuts. When he was done and had put bandaids on them Jack walked out of the bathroom and picked up his backpack. He dumped its contents on his bed and went over to one of his dressers. Eona jumped up on the desk and watched him as he pulled out clothes and packed them into their bag. Self-consciously, Eona turned her head and licked at the small gashes hidden under her fur, then groomed herself.

When Jack was done packing it was 4:30 and Jack could hear his father puttering downstairs in the kitchen. He flopped back on his bed, wincing when he hit his notebooks and pencils, then moved around to get more comfortable. Eona jumped up and laid on his stomach. With his hands under his head and legs hanging off the bed Jack thought about the upcoming night. He’d never been to someone’s house overnight, who wasn’t his relative, and didn’t know what to expect or how to act. Anxiety crept up on him, making its way deep into his bones and settling in his stomach. With a heavy sigh and a thousand thoughts running through his head Jack sat up, pet Eona, and started on his homework. Waiting for his father to leave and for Alex to arrive.  


	5. Chapter 5

As 5 o’clock approached Jack’s concentration on his homework wore thin. Whenever his father’s motions downstairs made a sharper and louder noise Jack’s heart rate would shoot up. But those moments when Jack- when even Eona’s sharp cat-like ears couldn’t hear his father downstairs were even worse. When they didn’t know what Bassam was doing or where he was in the house Jack’s hands shook, making it nigh impossible for him to finish his short journal assignment for his fourth period English course. At 4:58 Jack threw in the metaphorical towel.

His mouth still tasted like puke, even though it was mostly masked by the lingering spearmint mouthwash. After taking a deep shaking breath in an attempt to calm his anxiety riddled heart and mind Jack stood up and walked to his bathroom again with Eona intertwining in-between his legs with each step. Jack reached and grabbed his toothbrush and the tube of paste and wiped a small sliver of the unnaturally aqua blue paste on the bristles while Eona preened and primed herself on the sink to his left. His hand had just reached his mouth when Eona stiffened. Half a moment later Jack dropped his toothbrush and hurried back into his room just in time to be on his bed when his father opened his bedroom door without knocking. With Eona safely in the bathroom out of site Bassam’s focus was on his son. “I’m leaving now, boy.” Jack nodded. “I’ll see you on Sunday.” Jack nodded again. “House better be clean and my beers untouched.” Jack nodded a third time. Bassam cast a short look around the room before focusing one last time on Jack. Bassam nodded and muttered “Right, good bye” and turned and left, heading down the hall then the stairs. Jack nodded once again even though his father couldn’t see and his mouth finally opened. But no words came out. 3 words, however, were left on his tongue.

_I love you._

Those words had formed and almost left his mouth and had almost been uttered without a thought. The front door downstairs opened and slammed shut. Bassam’s car started, stuttered, and Jack heard it pull out and drive off.

_I_ _love you._

Jack lay down in shock. He hadn’t said those 3 words in years. When was the last time he had? “The day our mother died.” Eona softly said and curled up beside his head. Jack remembered that day. His mother… Jack remembered his kind and loving mother. He remembered when she was alive and Bassam had been a better man, one without guilt and grief, one who loved his son. He remembered when they were a family, when Bassam would talk to- would pet and just interact with Eona in a way that wasn’t negative. He remembered when he had been loved and when he had been happy.

* * *

 

Time slipped by too fast as Jack and Eona thought about the past. Soon, all too soon, there was a knock from downstairs from someone at the front door. Jack reached out and grabbed his phone. 5 new texts. All from Alex. The last one saying “Here!” There came another knock. “Just a second!!” Jack yelled down and quickly texted “Be out in a minute.” to Alex. Immediately his phone lit up showing that Alex had replied with a smiley face. Jack stood up and grabbed his packed backpack. “Ready?” He looked down at Eona. Her fur was slightly puffed out; they were both anxious. She nodded and went out in front of him down the hall and stairs, leaving him to turn off the light and follow.

Jack opened the door and Eona jumped up and climbed onto his shoulder. Alex, who was just outside standing on the porch smiled widely at them. Jack’s heart skipped a beat. “Everything good?” Alex asked, casually leaning to peer over his other shoulder into the dark house. “Yeah, we’re good to go.” Jack quickly stepped out and shut and locked the door. Alex nodded, smile dimming for only a second. “Cool, c’mon then.” And he led them down the path to his car.

The drive was short and thankfully Jack didn’t have to talk. All he had to do was sit back and watch as Alex sang along to the radio and danced in his seat. Alex pulled into a paved driveway and parked. After turning off the car the three of them got out and Jack and Eona followed Alex up the path and into the house after he had gotten his gear out of the back. “Mom!? I’m home! And uh, Jack and Eona are here!” Alex toed off his shoes and dropped his soccer bag next to them. Jack took his shoes off as well, but kept his backpack on. “Mom?” Alex walked in and waved for Jack to follow him. “In the kitchen!” Alex smiled and led them to the kitchen. “Hey.” Alex walked up behind the woman and hugged her. Jack watched from the doorway and Eona closed her eyes and rested her head against his leg. Alex’s mom was brunette and she had a kind face. “Oh!” She exclaimed when she turned around and saw Jack and his daemon. “You must be Jack and Eona!” She advanced towards them and both of them moved slightly away but stopped when she offered her hand. Jack offered a small smile, nodded and shook her hand gently. “It’s wonderful to have you two here.” She smiled warmly at them but seemed to notice their posture and moved back to the counter. “Now, dinner’s just about ready, why don’t you and Alex head on upstairs and drop your stuff in his room, wash up and come back down to eat.” Alex rolled his eyes behind her back fondly but grinned at Jack and Eona. “Sure, mom” Alex walked over to them. “Do you have any food allergies or anything, dear?” Jack felt himself flush at the attention and quickly shook his head then turned and followed Alex out and up the stairs.

“Sorry about that, she loves having people over to the house.” Alex explained when they got to his room. Alex’s room was significantly larger and nicer than Jack and Eona’s. His walls were a dark blue and covered almost entirely with posters and pictures. It was a bit messier, with clothes strewn over the carpeted beige floor. He had a TV in the corner and a couple stacks of DVDs and video games. An Xbox One and PlayStation 4 were laying by the TV and Jack spotted an Xbox controller on one of the dressers. “Just put your stuff anywhere, guys.” Alex waved a hand and headed over to a laundry basket and pulled out a red shirt. Jack set his backpack on the bed and blushed when Alex changed shirts. Alex didn’t notice and threw the dirty shirt into a pile by the window. “Alright, let’s go.” Jack nodded and grinned back at Alex. This would be good for them, Jack thought hopefully.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so Jack's mom died a few years back.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for going awol on ALL my stories the semester's almost over, and I had to do 3 creative writing papers, which took up all my creativity and motivation. Hopefully I'll get back at it again when finals are over next week.

Dinner had been good. Jack was reminding himself in the bathroom, looking straight into the eyes of his reflection. Eona sat on the edge of the bathtub behind him, grooming her fur. To anyone else it Eona would have looked calm, especially in comparison to her human, but the anxiety was sitting heavily in the bottom of her stomach just as it was in Jack’s. There was no reason for Jack to be panicking. Isobel was kind and didn’t push or ask too many questions. And it had just been the 4 of them; Alex, his mom-Isobel, Jack, and Eona, so there was no reason for Jack and Eona to be in the downstairs bathroom trying to catch their breath. “Let’s go now; before they get suspicious,” Eona murmured. Jack nodded and smiled at her in the mirror. “C’mon then.” Jack carefully picked his daemon up and left the bathroom. Alex and Isobel were still in the kitchen, putting away food and washing dishes, respectively. Alex noticed them first. “Hey, ready to go upstairs?” Jack nodded, but asked “Do you guys need help with anything?” and gestured around the kitchen. “No, dear, I’ll finish up here, you three go on upstairs, go on.” Isobel waved them off. “Come on, before she changes her mind” Alex was grinning as he raced past them up the stairs. Jack grinned back, despite himself and followed.

The rest of the night flew by, after a few awkward moments of Jack admitting that they had never actually played most of the games Alex had, Jack got the hang of Mario Kart and was on a five-race winning streak. After his 6th win, winning him 1st place overall Alex yelled. “Oh come on! Dude, how in the hell?” Jack laughed, knowing that Alex wasn’t really mad at him. Alex smiled at him and threw his controller in their direction missing Jack, but almost hitting Eona. “Sorry E, I was aiming for this jerk.” Alex flopped down on his beanbag and stared up at his ceiling, missing their looks of shock. Eona got up and wandered over closer to Alex, stopping behind his head. His eyes were shut, but he opened them when he felt her breath on his face. And he jerked in shock, but thankfully stopped himself and calmed down, so he didn’t hit her. “Uh, hey?” Alex, without moving looked over at Jack, who just shrugged. “You called her ‘E.'” Alex blinked, then remembered. “Oh, shit, I’m sorry.” He looked at Eona again, finding her staring intently at him. “No, no, it’s fine. It’s just most people don’t even acknowledge her, let alone give her a nickname or whatever.” Alex’s mouth turned down into a slight frown. “Does that bother you?” Jack shook his head, “No, we’re fine; you can call her E if you want; she doesn’t mind, we don’t mind.” Eona sat back, giving Alex enough room so he could sit up. “I meant, does it bother you guys when people treat Eona like she’s not there?” Jack thought silently, and Alex watched him. “No, or well- yes. Yeah, it bothers us, but it’s better than them treating her like she’s just a pet or like an object. E’s alive, she has a mind and consciousness, she’s not an _it._ ” He stressed the last part. Alex thought of their first day at school, about how Mrs. Tenner had treated them. “That sucks, man.” Jack shrugged and put his controller down and moved to sit more comfortably, crisscross style and lifted Eona up when she walked over and settled her in his lap. Alex wanted to say more, like, I’m sorry that people are ignorant and mean, I think you two are cool, Eona’s really pretty, you have nice hair, and a cute laugh, and a cute butt. But he didn’t say any of that. “So you want to watch a movie or something?” Jack shrugged. “What time is it?” Alex leaned over, closer to Jack and Eona, to grab his phone. “9:52” Alex told them, and tossed his phone down again. “We can watch a movie if you want,” Alex grinned. “Okay, but you two get to pick, I’m gonna get some food; I’ll bring some up.” And he gestured to the stacks of DVDs by the TV before standing up and leaving the room.

Eona rubbed her head on Jacks chest. “He’s too good.” She whispered, her whiskers tickling Jack’s neck. He nodded. Alex was too good for him. “He won’t hurt us,” Jack repeated the sentence that had been running through both of their heads. “He won’t hurt us.” Eona echoed in agreement. Jack sighed and pulled himself up and started looking through Alex’s movies.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I'm going to have Jack/Eona have a panic attack the next chapter or so when Zack and Rian and Alex and them are practicing. Let me know what you think, comments are welcomed


	7. Chapter 7

The two boys had fallen asleep sometime around 2, and Eona stayed up for another hour or so. Alex had insisted that Jack and Eona take the bed, and he’d take the futon in the corner. Jack had a brief moment of panic when he woke up in someone else’s bed, but Eona calmed him down quickly from her perch on the windowsill above Alex’s head. Alex was still sleeping; he was sprawled out with one arm under his head and pillow and the other flung over the futon’s edge and touching the floor, the blankets were tangled up around his waist and legs. Jack sat up, yawned widely, and stretched. He got out from under the warm blankets and tiptoed to the bathroom. When he came out Alex was sitting up, back against the wall with his eyes closed. Eona had moved to the other end of the windowsill and was grooming herself.

“Morning,” Jack said as he walked over to his bag and grabbed a new shirt and a pair of clean boxers, he hadn’t packed any pants, but he could wear yesterday’s jeans. Alex yawned, waved at him and went into the bathroom. Jack changed while the door was closed. He was stuffing his clothes in his bag when Alex came out, just in boxers and not the shirt he had worn to bed. Jack awkwardly stared, but Alex didn’t notice as he rummaged through his drawers.

“I think we’re the only ones home right now, my parents should be at work by now, what do you want for uh…” Alex glanced at his alarm clock. “Lunch?” Jack blinked, then processed what Alex had asked.

“Oh, uh, anything’s good, we’re not very picky.” They ended up making turkey sandwiches. While they were sitting in the kitchen, with Alex on one end and Jack opposite him and Eona curled up on Jack’s left with her head resting on his forearm.

“So, Rian and Zack are going to be here soon.” Alex set down his phone that he had been using.

“Okay.” A small knot was twisting itself in his chest, but it wasn’t too bad- yet. Eona’s tail, which had been swishing lazily in the air stilled and she rubbed her cheek against Jack’s arm.

“Want to help me set up the basement?” Jack nodded, having something to do would help stall off his anxiety. Once again, Alex’s house proved to be the opposite of Jack’s own. The basement was carpeted with cream painted walls and soft lights. A few storage shelves with plastic containers were back behind the stairs, out of view, and in the corner was a small area with mic stands, speakers, wires, a keyboard, an old drum set and three guitars.

“So, the kit’s Rian’s old one, he dropped it off on Thursday, the blue guitar is the one I usually play, so you can pick either of the two others. I’m gonna get these wires sorted if you wanted to tune it and just adjust it, so you’re comfortable. Jack nodded, throat tight.

“Thanks” he managed to get out and he picked up the black guitar. He pulled the strap over his head and adjusted it so the guitar felt right in his hands. Jack slowly and carefully tuned the guitar while watching Alex bend and duck to connect wires and plug in plugs. There was a loud knock from upstairs, and Alex’s phone rang.

“Can you get that?” Alex was busy untangling some wires, so Jack picked up his phone. 

“Hello?” Eona’s ears twitched and she turned her head towards the stairs. 

“Jack? It’s Zack, we’re outside.” 

“Door’s unlocked.” Alex told Jack without looking up. 

“Alex said it’s unlocked.” 

“Cool” and Zack hung up. Jack set Alex’s phone down just as Zack and Rian came down. “Hey, guys.” Zack waved to Jack. Jack shot him a small smile back. He leaned against the wall and closed his eyes and tried to breathe normally. In-out. There wasn’t anything to worry about. Zack, Rian, and Alex were all good people, they were nice to Jack and Eona- they were his friends, there was no reason to panic. A hand grasped his shoulder. 

“Jack?” He started, eyes flying open. Rian was in front of him looking worried. “Are you okay? We’re ready to start if you are.” Jack nodded and swallowed around the lump in his throat.

“Yeah, sorry, just tired.” Jack gave a smile. Act normal. Rian still looked worried, and Jack didn’t dare look at Zack or Alex yet. 

“Okay.” Rian walked over to his kit and sat down behind it. 

“Here, plug yourself in.” Alex offered him a cable with a wide grin. “Ready?” Alex asked after Jack had plugged his guitar in. 

“Yeah”

“Yep” Zack and Rian replied and Jack nodded.

 “So, let’s just start off with some covers, yeah?” Alex suggested. “Jack said they know Damnit and Adam’s Song; we can start with those two?” Everyone agreed and Rian started them out. It went pretty well, they all played together nicely. There had been a few issues, most of them technical, but soon it was 4 o’clock and they all heard the front door open and Mrs. Gaskarth calling out an 

“I’m home, boys!” Alex lifted his guitar over his head and he set it down. 

“Well, that’s our queue to stop, I guess.” Jack handed his guitar off to Alex and helped Rian move his drums back against the wall. Eona, who had been dozing on the stairs as they played yawned widely- an act that Jack copied, despite his back being to his daemon. Alex saw that and grinned wildly at Eona. She tilted her head then wrinkled her nose and licked her paw. 

“Alright, that was awesome guys!” Zack enthused and threw an arm around Jack’s shoulder. Jack immediately stiffened, the panic that had been stirring inside of him intensified and he stopped breathing for a moment. Zack and Alex noticed the look of fear and Zack was going to lift his arm off of Jack. But Jack quickly recovered, untensing. 

“Yeah, pretty cool.” He agreed truthfully, but with fake enthusiasm. His right hand grabbed his left wrist in a nervous motion and his fingers, unconsciously, scratched at his sleeve. Zack took his hand away, giving Jack a pat on the shoulder. 

“So, I’ll see you guys tomorrow, right?” Zack stopped at the bottom of the stairs. “You guys are trying out, right?” Zack looked at Jack. 

“Oh, uh, yeah.” Jack stuttered and bent down to pick up Eona. 

“Sweet, well I have to go, Mike’s taking me out to the movies at 7. See you!” Zack waved as he headed up the stairs. 

“Are you two okay?” Alex sounded worried. 

“What?” Jack looked up from his daemon. “Oh, yeah, we’re fine.” Eona nodded, intently staring at Alex. 

“Okay man, are you guys hungry? I’m pretty sure Rian’s already in the kitchen.” Jack looked around, he hadn’t noticed Rian go upstairs. He shrugged and followed Alex anyway. Jack walked slowly and hung back in the doorframe of the kitchen as he watched Alex get a bag of chips and sit on the stool next to Rian. Jack’s hands were shaking, he clenched them together at his sides after Eona dropped to the floor. 

“Want some?” Rian stretched out his hand and offered Jack his bag of chips. Jack shook his head and turned a grimace into a smile. 

“Not really hungry.” He felt nauseous, why was he so anxious? Nothing bad was going to happen. He was fine. Eona was fine. They were fine. Jack felt Alex’s worried gaze as he sat down. Eona jumped up on the counter and head-butted his arm until he pet her. 

“Calm down” she whispered into his ear, “We’re safe, deep breaths” Her tail swished back and forth nervously. 

"Right, okay" Jack tried to breathe evenly. 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is continuing, there will be more, I know I've been sort of MIA, but I'm back


	8. Chapter 8

Jack loved Eona more than himself, but sometimes he wished that she hadn’t settled into an Egyptian Mau. Before their mother died Eona had shifted from one form to the next, usually a predator of some kind. Something big and loud and brash, because that was the kind of child Jack had been. Then, after she had passed and after Jack’s father started drinking Eona stayed small. She shifted into forms that wouldn’t draw too much attention, those that were able to be hidden away in pockets. If she had settled into something larger maybe, Jack wouldn’t be bullied as much- if she was a predator she could protect him. And if she were smaller then maybe his dad wouldn’t be so angry, wouldn’t drink so much, wouldn’t…

Jack let out another silent sob and hugged his knees tighter against his chest. His chest hurt, his head ached, his stomach was doing somersaults, and tears were running down his cheeks.  _ Anxiety _ . The bathroom door swung open and hit the tiled wall with a resounding  _ crack _ . Jack bit his lip to hold in another sob. 

"Jack?" 

Eona looked up from where she was cowering in the opposite corner of the stall.

"Jack? Please, are you two okay?"

Eona's gaze swung over to her human, eyes pleading. Jack shook his head and hid his face from her.

"Jack??"

Alex's voice went a little louder, a little firmer, and a little desperate. A second later he banged twice on the door. 

"Jack, please, I need to know if you're okay."

His pleas didn't reach Jack. Jack felt like he was underwater, everything was muffled, his vision blurred, his breathing increase, even more, nasty thoughts bounced around in his head, and his hands came up and pulled desperately at his hair. Eona stood up but hesitated to move towards her human after what had happened.

"Jack?"

Jack shook his head, biting his bottom lip to hold in a sob. 

"Go away, Alex."

His voice was warbled and cracked. 

"Go away." 

Jack whispered. 

"Jack, please, let me in."

"Go away. Go away. Go away. Go away..."

Jack repeated, rocking back and forth. 

Eona looked from Jack to the stall door and back. She walked to the door and stood up on her hind legs and unlocked the bathroom stall. 

Alex hurriedly pulled the door back. 

He stared at Eona before turning his gaze to Jack. 

"Hey."

He addressed the two of them. 

"Go away. Go away. Go away..."

Jack hadn't stopped mumbling or shaking, and his hands remained on his head. 

"Help him, please."

Alex startled and looked at Eona in awe. 

"Please."

Her voice was soft and melodic. Dumbfounded Alex nodded and knelt down in front of Jack. He reached out and placed a hand on Jack's shoulder. 

"Jack?"

Jack shook his head.

"Hey, Jack, look at me, man."

Alex glanced at Eona before moving to sit next to Jack. He put his arm around Jack's shoulders and pulled him in. 

"Hey, shhh."

Alex tried to comfort him. After a few minutes of Alex rubbing small circles on Jack's back Jack's sobs died down.

"I'm sorry."

Jack mumbled, embarrassed.

"Feeling better?"

Alex looked down at his friend. Jack nodded. Alex hesitated before gently asking.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Jack shook his head, just as Alex thought he would.

“Okay, we don’t have to talk about it, but I just want you to know that it's not your fault and Rian, Zack, and I are here for you; whatever you need.”

Jack wiped at his nose. 

“Thank you” 

He whispered. Alex nodded and continued to rub his friend’s back as the three of them lapsed into a long silence. After awhile Alex turned to Eona.

“That goes for you too, E. We’re your friends as well as Jack’s.”

If it were possible for a cat to blush Eona would have, but as she could not her human blushed for her. 

“Thank you, Alex.”

She said in a melodic whisper from her spot away from her human. Alex nodded and looked from her to Jack to her again before settling on Jack. 

“Always. I’ll always be there for you two.”  

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey. not dead. woo.


	9. Chapter 9

After the incident on Sunday Jack spent nearly all his time with Alex, Zack, and Rian. Mostly with Alex. He didn't want to go home.  Jack was terrified of what his father would do, what his father would say, how his father would react. And he didn't want to be alone since Eona was ignoring him (it made his bones ache). He wasn't eating, he could barely sleep, and he always had a razor blade with him. He was falling apart.

The first few days Alex invited Jack and Eona over after school, then after that the five of them spent time at Zack's or Rian's as well, or they went out. But after about two weeks, Jack began to feel like he was being stupid and clingy and that he was a burden to everyone around him, even his daemon (who was still ignoring him), so he started lying to the guys. He said things at home were fine now, that his father had cooled down. But it wasn't and he hadn't.

It helped that no one really witnessed what occurred between Bassam and Jack, no one except Eona. Jack started staying after school or going to the library, just to avoid going back to his house. He would sneak in after he was sure Bassam was asleep, he even slept hidden under his bed just to be safe.  

On the plus side, his grades were never better, but while his grades were all A's Jack felt more depressed and anxious than he ever had before. During school everything was alright, Eona was able to ignore him without anyone really noticing (she still let him touch her during school, but his heart ached). He still kept his head down and didn't talk to anyone unless they spoke to him first, but it was good. For awhile. 

Almost a month and a half after that Sunday things came to a head. It had been too long of a day. Jack hadn't eaten breakfast and had only picked at his lunch again, something that the others noticed with concerned looks that Jack pretended he didn't see. He had woken up too early when his father woke up half drunk and trashed the kitchen around 4 am. He hadn't been able to get his coat or even a hoodie with his dad downstairs, so he was freezing cold in just his long sleeved shirt. He had three fading cuts hidden behind the thin fabric and five new ones on his thighs that burned whenever he moved from the friction of his jeans.

The bell had just rung, signalling the end of French class. The rest of the students filed out of the room quickly. Jack was light-headed and sluggish. He slowly got up, knowing that if he went to quickly his vision would black out. He swayed on his feet and nearly tripped over Eona's bag. She hissed.  _she hissed at him._

"Jack?"

Alex. Jack looked over to see Alex waiting for him with a look of worry. 

"Are you two okay?"

No. Jack wanted to say, but didn't. He nodded and gathered his stuff and Eona's bag. Halfway down the hallway towards their next class Alex stopped and caught Jack by his shoulder, stopping him as well. 

Alex had a complicated look on his face. And Jack leaned against some lockers and waited. 

"Alex?"

They were going to be late. Alex bit his bottom lip and sighed.

"I know you aren't okay, Jack."

Alex looked him directly in his eyes.

"These past couple of weeks we've been worried, Jack. You aren't yourself. Neither of you are. Jack, Eona, what's wrong? Jack, you look like your dying and the two of you seem to be avoiding each other. I never see you petting E anymore, Jack. And Eona you aren't rubbing up against him and comforting him, like you did. So what's going on? What's wrong? And please no more bull-shit."

Jack looked away. He couldn't and wouldn't tell Alex. 

"It's fine, Alex."

Jack's eyes snapped back to Alex when he took a sharp breath in.

"I said no more bullshit, Jack."

Alex raised his voice a little. 

Jack took a step back.

"We're going to be late."

The halls were already empty, the warning bell rang. Jack began to walk away.

"No. We're talking about this Jack."

Alex reached out and grabbed Jack's arm, pressing down hard, unknowingly, on Jack's cuts.

Instinctively, Jack pulled his arm away, the motion throwing him off balance, making him drop Eona's bag.

She jumped out of her bag with a sharp yowl and hissed at him again.

Both Alex and Jack froze. 

Then Jack started moving, feeling the need to get away. He didn't pick up Eona or her bag.

"Jack!"

Alex called and moved to follow him, but Eona hissed at him as well.

"What?"

Alex looked from the daemon to Jack's retreating figure in confusion. 


End file.
